Category Archives: Parenting
Is God addressing California?
This week California had scares of strong earthquakes within 48 hours. On July 4th, we experienced a 6.4 earthquake centered in the Kern County city of Ridgecrest, near Southern California.
Subsequently, on July 5th we were hit with another 5.4 aftershock in the early morning and a 7.1 stronger earthquake that had its epicenter near Ridgecrest right about 8.20pm that night. Continue reading
When someone tease your family name, tell them you are proud of who you are. Do not let anyone make you feel ashamed because you are bullied for it. Your family name is something you inherit from generations before you. Your heritage, your family name reveals who you are. Continue reading
WHAT LED TO THIS QUESTION ABOUT SATAN?
Satan- ‘Why does God create satan?’ was the most interesting question that my 5-year-old asked me today.
So, how did this question come about in our conversation? Part of our conversation was: ‘Who is satan?’
When we talk about who satan is, we talk about the existence of evil. If we further elaborate on what evil is, and know what evil is capable of, then why does God create satan? Here’s what our conversation led to.
FREEWILL TO LOVE
To love God, God demands that we love Him with all our hearts, our minds, and our souls. Why can’t God simply accept it when we say we love him? Does God insist that we love Him with all our hearts, minds and souls? What has it to do with satan then?
Have you ever expect that your spouse whom you love will love you back in return? Love is the most beautiful thing on this earth. When you truly love, you give your all to that which you love, am I right?
Sometimes, your love is not reciprocated. That is why love can be hurtful. When God creates us, He desires for us to love Him fully, wholeheartedly. Yet, at the same time, He recognizes that His creation may not reciprocate in the same manner. That He allows freewill.
The same way we are capable of – to love with all our hearts, minds and souls or to hate and despise Him. In order to know for sure, who truly loves you, you have to allow that person that freewill to not love you.
WHY THEN DOES GOD CREATE SATAN?
Which lead us back to this question: ‘Why does God create satan?’ God created Lucifer, the arc angel Lucifer. Lucifer was a high ranking angel. He was created to worship God and be God’s messenger. However, he wanted to become like God, became a rebel and fell away from Him.
Lucifer later became satan, the originator of evil. Lucifer became the deceiver. Therefore it is safe to say that Lucifer is the creator of the persona of satan, the evil that is rampant in our invisible realm. If God did not create satan, then why did He not put a stop to him anyway?
GOD CREATES HELL FOR SATAN AND HIS FOLLOWERS
God passed His judgement on satan by sending him and his followers to hell. That would be their final resting place. God must have hate satan so much that He send him to hell, right? Good question!
I don’t think God hate Lucifer, but the evil and darkness that deceive so many. The attempt that satan masterminds to take with him as many of God’s creation to hell is despicable to speak the least. Why should God tolerate such act?
Many think God is a tyrant, merciless and cruel Ruler. Yet, when they take time to read the Bible, they discover opposite is true. Through the Bible, we know God became man in the person of Jesus Christ (Son of God).
Jesus through his life, we know that he was humiliated, misunderstood, and died on the Cross (treated like a criminal). But, was glorified through his resurrection, 3 days after his death on the Cross.
JESUS THE SACRIFICIAL LAMB
The only reason Jesus came to live on earth for 33 years, he fits the description of the sacrificial lamb (the only offering that could appease God).
If God is indeed a tyrant, merciless and cruel as many think, why would He sacrifice Himself to die on the Cross and His blood that cleanses us from all our sins (wrong doing) and set us free to be with Him forever in Heaven?
The only explanation is this, He loves what He created and treasure everyone of them.
But, for those who choose to hate Him anyway, there is nothing more He could do but to let you have your way. Sometimes, when you do your best to provide for your children and yet your children cannot appreciate the good you do for them, you simply have to let them go and give them time to find their way home back to you.
This is all I have to say. Good nite to you all and may you spot that light that help you figure out the answer you are looking for. Feel fress to visit our Facebook Page.
Good Enough, Mom?
Are you moms who are struggling with self-confidence that ask constantly: ‘Am I good enough?’ and ‘Have I done enough?’ Today, I like to say: ‘You are good enough and you are brave.’ Don’t let others tell you otherwise.
Good Enough Is Not Enough
Parents enter into this journey with nothing but clean clear pages with nothing written on them. You look for manuals but found none. You look for instructions and got disappointed. We literally have to pray through our pregnancies at all times and I suspect that every pregnancy is covered by prayers from those who love us.
Meanwhile, we study the handbook ensuring that we are prepared when baby arrives. The truth is no matter how prepared we think we are, there is always something that reminds us otherwise. Do we struggle to become the best? If we compare with other moms, are we at the 99.9 percentile? The top 1% in the parenting world?
Good Enough Is The Best We Know How
Through this journey of parenting, we learn to take note. We observe, we question and we take notes. That is how we become the best because we learn through our mistakes. That is also how I believe God grows our mindset as parents. It is also through our desperate times, we come to God for help.
Do we need all our questions answered? The answer is no. The learning continues as we grow through our life experiences. We learn to make better choices over our failures. Interestingly, we learn to increase our ability to work within our limitations over time. We have become therefore the best that we know how. That is good enough by the way, moms.
You Are A Brave Mom! That Is Good Enough
Parenting is no easy feat. Trust me! You need courage and grit. For that reason you are brave enough. Look at your child’s achievements not failures. Seek to empower not put down. Look at how much you have grown as a mom and dad. You are brave enough to take on the challenges of raising a lifelong learner. That is good enough! Don’t you think?
Enjoy your special day with your families mothers. Don’t worry too much. You have it made. If you enjoy reading my blogs, click like and share on DOTA Facebookpage
A Talk About Anger
As a parent, did you ever have to talk to your child about anger? The issue is real in a child growing up. There are moments where as a parent we have to engage and sometimes confront our kids about their struggle coping with it. It is not a pleasant conversation but a necessary reinforcement if the behavior persists.
My question is: What would you tell your child about the emotion? Yes, anger is a natural emotion that if provoked, is normal. But, the issue is how do you regulate that emotion and not be subdued by it? What do you mean? Well, here’s where I would like to discuss whether being angry is a problem or is inability to control it, the problem? What then is the solution if any?
Cause And Effect Of Anger
Do you agree with me that such emotion is not desirable and not acceptable socially? Now ask yourself why it is so? So, you think it is destructive? Have you thought about why such behavior is destructive?
I have a 5-year-old whom I spend substantial time explaining why anger is not an emotion that brings happiness around people. This is what I’ve said to him. Do not try to collect and stay angry for a long time. The more frustration you collect, the worst you would feel inside. It would eventually reach a point you cannot hold in any longer and you explode.
When you explode, others around you get hurt. So, they begin to collect anger like you and the more they collect, the more they hold in and subsequently, they explode too. This time, when they explode, you get hurt by them. The cycle continues.
Questions And Discussion – Is Anger A Good Thing?
At this point, I stop to ask him some questions. Do you think being angry is a good thing? Why and why not? I need to ask these questions in order to know if he understands what I’m trying to tell him. Being a bright little guy, he shows that he has understood me. So, he concludes that being and stay angry is not a good thing because it hurts others and himself. So, what’s the solution?
What Would You Tell Your Child? – Staying Away From Anger
Now, I change the scenario and instead of staying angry, I encourage him to think about what if. What if you give away hugs? What would happen? Everyone is happy. What are we collecting this time? Happiness. Is happiness a good thing? When you feel good and everyone around you feels good, it brings joy and smiles instead of hurts. Let us collect hugs and spread happiness instead. We need to understand that in some cases, there are exceptions.
Exceptional Situation Beyond Our Understanding
Some kids have difficulty controlling their emotions due to some disability, that is true. Emotional outbursts are often the result of a child’s inability to control his/her emotion. Expressing complex emotions can be perplexed for some, therefore, it is a real difficult challenge for them. There are several reasons why they are struggling although, there are times, it may not necessary be their fault.
For example, children with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) have difficulty controlling their emotions and we need sensitivity and awareness when we meet a child with ADHD. How do we encourage our kids to include friends with ADHD during play time?
The Next Question Is
How do we then teach our children to relate with others who are different? Fear often stops us from wanting to relate with someone who is different from us. There are several reasons why we are afraid. How do we teach our kiddos to open up to peers unlike their thinking?
If you have any input to add to our discussion, please feel free to comment on our post below. What would you say is a good solution to teach our kiddos about anger and what can we learn from them?
The New Chapter – As David’s Learning Coach
Excitement continued to build up when we finally had a chance to talk to his new teacher over the phone. To cut the story short, David was transferred from Transitional Kindergarten to Kindergarten.
The New Chapter Comes The New Reality
Now, after the introduction to David’s new school online, Dan and I were told about our roles as his learning coaches. We had to go through orientation courses to get ready for this new role we were about to embark with him. The reality of being David’s learning coach finally set in. It took me a while to adapt and adjust to this new role in my life. Seven weeks had past and David did well although not always smooth sailing, we made it. This week, his teacher is preparing to meet all the parents and planning for the next quarter. We are meeting her on the 24th of October in the morning.
The Knots Behind My New Chapter – As A Learning Coach
He never has to do any intense work all through his 4 years on earth so far. He gets to play all day and not much schooling unless he wants to. If he does do any school work, they have never bothered him before. They are usually fun for him. About 4-5 weeks into our homeschooling program, David mentioned that school was hard work. The 7 weeks of homeschooling was not always smooth sailing like I’ve said before.
We struggled and got back to school on several occasions. One of the struggle we had was trying to get all the various phonic sounds accurately. I was born with a cleft palate and teaching David phonics was a tremendous task for me. Sometimes, if you know David, he liked to be the teacher instead.. and that did not help either. Unfortunately, the struggle might have caused him some anxiety which did not help our relationship as mom and son. At times, I wished the struggles never happened. Other than phonics, we got along pretty well.
The Needs To Advocate As A Mom In This New Chapter
I was his mom to begin with, although in my new chapter I was called to be David’s learning coach. I felt as his mom, I needed to fight for what was best for him. In so many way, I could work around to keep him engaged and growing in knowledge because I knew how to work according to his ability. He did great in many areas in Kindergarten however, I felt he needed more challenge in Mathematics so my mommy instinct kicked in.
I felt the need to push for more expectation from his Kindergarten teacher despite the fact that as a law abiding citizen, I grew up following rules and regulations. This is clearly another new chapter in my life. From a reserved and timid individual, I have become an advocate and David’s learning coach. This new chapter brought forth some epiphany moments in me.
The Epiphany Behind My New Chapter As David’s Learning Coach
Into the 7 weeks of homeschooling David, I got to see him for the first time cutting shapes independently using a safety scissors. He is able to write phrases reasonably well in lower case letters. So much so that even Grandpa noticed how much he improved in his handwriting. This proud mama had to share with his teacher.
The epiphany moment came when his teacher called me ‘a blessed homeschooling mom’. You see, 7 weeks before, we were not sure if we were ready to home-school David. However, 7 weeks into his Kindergarten, mommy suddenly realized we made the right choice to home-school him. We got to see, our own ‘aha’ moment. Nothing is more worthwhile than experiencing our ‘aha’ moments with David.
New Chapter -What’s For The Future?
For now, we are happy with our decision. We will continue to home-school David until the need arises to make another decision together. To work harder at improving my skills as a learning coach and be more sensitive to David’s feelings to build him up.
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